flashman181

Where to start. I have a theory. All Brontosauruses are thin at one end. Oops wrong theory. At least that one is factual. All we have in the US election though are theories about the release of Donny’s Donts and Hils private thoughts. More women have lined up to complain about Donny then at a Boxing Day sale. Oh dear, I have just given him a whole new group to harass. As said in other media commitments enough is enough and if the Clinton campaign is orchestrating a slow trickle (and not just Bill these days) of stories then cease and desist because the US public are largely sick of it. The one aspect that could lead to an unexpected result is poor voter turnout and you need to envigorate the people not disgust them. If not disgusted yet by Buffoon Bob then they never will. And now he is unshackled! Love the line about comparing him to King Kong – “breaks the shackles and gropes white women against their will” . Amazon forests have been cleared writing about this nonsense and climate change bought forward 3 years (thanks China!) with everything spoken about it. It use to be Jon Stewart as go to person but now it is Samantha Bee. Not only is she witty, smart and crude but also brings a female perspective to it all and you can see she is only barely controlling her anger as she delivers one great put down after another

Billy Bush gets suspended from his job because NBC has higher standards for reporters than many US voters have for Presidential candidates. Many of the Republican surrogates, mostly female nudge nudge wink wink, deflect to Bill Clinton’s behaviour as a way of justifying Donny Boy’s locker room bravado. It gets some traction of course but the big one about Clinton paying $800 k to settle a sexaul harassment lawsuit menas he was guilty even though Donny Boy always settles because he was innocent. Anderson Cooper nailed Conway on it and she was mega uncomfortable

Speaking of Conway the SNL clip of her day off was magic and probably pretty close to the mark this last week.

So, enough US politics for one week. Moving onto sport, the best thing about last nights Test match was Valentine Holmes is a Queenslander! The boy does fly. Kyrgios continues to prove he is an irredeemable clod. We finally have the Bathurst winner confirmed and any false impressions of Brocky as a charmimg playboy somewhat dashed. The two parter miniseries on Brock was an odd mix to say the least and reminds me Molly wasnt that bad and INXS almost Emmy worthy. Mind you if they ever do the life story of Bubba Watson – The Hillbilly Years they have the guy to play him when not appearing as a ghost on Offspring of course. Apparently there is a Test series of cricket coming up against SA with the only real interest is which ward of St Vincents the selectors will visit to pick their pace attack. Pat Cummins had a great return to one day game yesterday but has been told only to play one day cricket for rest of life so doesnt break down anymore at the ripe old age of 23. Thank Me we have all those conditioning experts on the ACB payroll

In TV land watching third season of Halt and Catch Fire which pretty well sums up my golf game at present. You know if I ever catch fire again that is. It is a great show and like the move to San Francisco. Hope they find my heart by season end. Watched the Aussie drama Deep Water which was good apart from William McInnes. As said many times, Aussies make great TV but do get sick and tired of seeing so many same old (and in same cases positively ancient) faces bob up. And memo to Check 1-2 McLachlan – stick to playing baddies as in Deep Water and not fluff as in Wrong Girl. Or not act at all of course, an appealing choice to be honest. Another Aussie newbie Rosehaven has some comedic chops but fear the lead guy could grate week after week. Exorcist is getting into the good stuff while Lethal Weapon has slightly improved as Wayans dials down the goof act a bit. Apart from expecting Jack Bauer to appear at any moment, Designated Survivor is engaging stuff and of course Shameless never disappoints

One may ask where do you get all this time to watch so much TV? Hell, I only list the good stuff! Plenty of time still spent out on Golf Club doing bunkers of course (on course actually) but this wind is doing my head in. All leaves blown out in morning, all return by afternoon. If there were not rakes left incorrectly at edge I guess more may blow in! Getting up at 5 am is probably the clue to having so much time left in the day. And some pleasantly cool weather of late as indicated by my two “go to” signs – aching shoulders at 4am in morning and the inability for automatic garage door to roll up and stay up. Probably a crude joke in there but we are not in a locker room ok.

HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGE ZINGER.

Going to a retro street party in a few weeks and “price of admission” is one LP of the vinyl variety. Knew I had a cache hidden somewhere under my signed Donny Osmond posters and eventually found them and what can only be called an electic mix

Slade – Sladest
Deep Purple – Made in Japan
Concert for Bangladesh
JC Superstar Original Soundtrack
Bad Company – Desolation Angels
Cocker – Cocker
Monty Python – 5 LPs!

Wish I had kept Smokie – The Hits to give away but was only a 45 to be fair. Bob Dylan won the Nobel Prize for Literature because they dont give one for Enunciation ?

One last thought. If they dont sort out this crazy clown nonsense soon I see some rather unfortunate events occurring this Halloween. Just saying

They say a week is a long time in politics. For me 90 minutes is too long. When it is a debacle. Sorry Debate. I really need to stop watching US politics so much as I despair for the world we live in at times. How anybody could say with a straight face that Buffoon Bob won the second debate is beyond reason. Yes, of course like everywhere else the media is biased and nowhere more so than in USA and so hard to get a fair review admittedly. So, instead will use my own two eyes, two ears and an IQ of at least double figures. I dont give a crap about Pussygate (or taxes for that matter) – it tells us nothing new about him. What drives me up the wall ( an actual one, not a dreamt up one) is he simply doesnt answer questions and no one pulls him up on it. His knowledge of the world is akin to that of his family tree – the Orangutan .The Supreme Court question was just one of many examples – yeah get another devil incarnate to replace the one that died but Hey Hilary why dont you contribute your own millions to your campaign eh? Huuuuuge Zinger ! Nope, simply embarrassing to a level where the bar is not even above ground. Some commented on the look on Hil’s face at times but truly believe she was as shocked as anyone with the dribble coming out – and she lives it 24/7! Of course she is far from perfect but at least she has a grasp of the world and what is going on even if she doesnt have all the right answers. I can only take it from his comment that Dickwad Don is going to send in a band of secret ninjas in the dark and reclaim Syria, Iraq, Libya and even Madagascar from those pesky , but adorable, zoo animals. His complaints about moderators and everything else simply reminds me of the Bill Maher tagline #whinylittlebitch . And the sniffs are back. So many great memes etc around at present but this one caught my eye as combines two simply bizarre current behaviours in the world

Of course with BB we know he thinks he is My answer to everything like knows the bible better than the Pope etc . He also thinks he is a great golfer so lets look at the swing. Ok, not Charles Barkley admittedly but that putting stroke looks “susceptible” and bet he wishes he could wear a suit on course. And then of course we get the crap about him handing out money at the end

In other sporting news we had two fairytales – AFL and NRL – and one nightmare – Aussie ODI tour of SA. Of most interest to me though was Bathurst yesterday. Watched the start as usual and then came back for last 20 laps and it was simply riveting television. The skill level of these guys is amazing and seeing them scream down Conrod reminded me of my recent lap record – 47 kph!

In between sport and politics was able to finally celebrate CLP birthday at the rather special Casa Di Natura. A great package of a sauna, a swim and a massage. And champers and choccies. Then they tell us you will be last couple to do package as closing down pool etc. Dont feel so bad about peeing in pool now

And before heading to Flashman Sunshine Coast INC HQ dropped into Rainbow Beach to catch up with da boys. Glorious day in a beautiful location

I tell ya, its a hard life but think I am up for it

In other news Summer is well and truly here , at least in Maryhole. Only a bit over 4 months to wait for Seattlandia I guess

And in other news my son finally went over to the darkside and joined Facebook and set a record for number of photos uploaded in any 24 hr period. But as they are mostly my gorgeous grandkids I will allow it this once

And then there were two and I just lost all interest. Tipped Melbourne several weeks ago and stick with that because as we all know you have to lose one first before winning one. Canberra showed inexperience last night on the big stage and it cost them dearly. As expected Cowboys were shot ducks by time they rolled into Sydney once more. Pity the AFL isnt going to be two Sydney teams though, that would have been funny. Jason Day still has shaggers back and so the final event has lost some appeal as well but still a good viewing spectacle. Just have to remember tomorrow that it is over by 7 am!

Speaking of a funny contest the US election campaign enters its 4 th year and the debate beckons. After Trump got his hair ruffled by lightweight Fallon , Clinton thought she would take the hard hitting interview route

This was both funny and cringeful at the same time. Barack can get away with it while Obama of the M variety may in fact be the most charismatic of them all. Zack had a couple of good zingers at least but one does wonder what Hil was trying to achieve – most BTF watchers would already be her supporters. Trump supporters are also easily recognisable. Just not believable

You cant write this stuff

In other TV news tis the season for newbies and there is a current fascination with turning movies into TV shows, both here and abroad. Lethal Weapon and Exorcist were first cabs of rank and no surprise for this LBD that any show with a Wayans in it was going to be hard to take. Couple of soppy ones like This is Us and Pitch both had their big twists in first ep so could all be downhill now. A comparatively short trip. With the 24 reboot just around the corner we are reminded of JB in Designated Survivor – interesting enough premise but very much in the Madam Secretary mould methinks and not West Wing. Or 24. Can certainly skip Graves while Bull has a definite Lie to Me vibe happening. In the remaining 30 minutes in the day quickly fast forward through returning shows like Shameless and Transparent

Did a bit of flirting this week and CLP fully understands. She is not only a year older but so much wiser to boot. I could be in trouble. I flirted with the idea of adding a week at beginning of next year holiday in cold old Chicago to get my winter fix as Summer kicks in here already. I look for signs – like “great today only super flight deals” . There were none. In fact there is the usual Qantas penalty for changing flights. It was going to cost at least 5 grand just for extra week before factoring in beer and peanuts. Its only money right? Well yes but I also went to doctor during week and he said I was looking as fit and healthy as ever. Then he took the glove off and we both relaxed. So I may live longer than expected, let alone fear. That 5 grand could come in handy. To go to Chicago the year after and do it proper eh! I may just need a leg up. Wait a minute……

And so the Broncos bow out for another year at least with some fight. When you have a makeshift centre pairing you are going to struggle and a 10 minute period in second half with two easy tries did that. After getting every call last week they squared the ledger this week, not that there were any howlers like last week. Two missed offside penalties (even Gus Gould acknowledged them!) were critical though especially the last one near full time. Of course the NSW media used all their ink last week moaning about how things went Broncos way – wont be a peep this week . You cant help but wish good things for JT though as he is simply all class. Parker wont look back on his last few games with any great pride and Milford was usual missing link. Boyd was good but backline in general lacking. The forwards need 5 more Thaidays. McGuire is a clown thug and Blair not much better. Gillet brain explosion didnt help anyone and tie that in with Roberts effort last week and there is your season gone. It can be a tough world at times and you have to think the Cowboys could be spent after last nights game. Luckily they only play Cronulla:) Would like to see Panthers win it all and some Bronco do something stupid on Monday just to round out their season in style. Jason Day is going to struggle next week again one assumes and you wouldnt want our Adam to have a 4 foot left to right slider to win it all on the 72nd. The gob merchant DJ looks a safe bet. Wallabies won a match and the fans rejoiced. Such a small group these days that largely went unnoticed

In the land of make believe people better get ready for a Trump presidency and then look in the mirror for the culprit. We now have the charm offensive in full swing even with some hair tussling involved. From afar it is no more believable as each week passes but becoming more understandable. You would have to think the debates are the last chance for him to totally stuff it all up so even the deplorables see it. In the land of political satire have to say Samantha Bee is knocking it out of the park while Colbert is only a shadow of his former self. Not really following the back and forth here on the plebiscite but seems an awful lot of money to spend on a no brainer. Guess that what happens when you have no brainers running the country

In TV land Offspring and Suits finished season/midseason finales and the world did truly rejoice. Offspring had a certain whimsy to start with along the lines of a Seachange for example but simply went gaga a season or two ago, came back after a break and did the impossible. It got worse. Once you lose whimsy you are dead in the water and we all know what that means. Sharks jump over you easily. As for Suits, well what can u say. Has one of the most unlikable characters in TV land in Rachel( only matched by Elizabeth on Blacklist for this LBD) and a plot line of late simply of the charts. There are too many ridiculous things to list and still get to sleep tonight – except maybe the A Few Good Men reference! – so lets just say sayonara to both shows for ever. In a pleasant surprise though a new show Quarry comes along and looks like the cats pyjamas. Like Aquarius before it is set in a great time period in USA -early 70s. Great cast and interesting plot so far . Many other shows return next couple of weeks but not getting sucked into AHS again.

In other news, nothing happened

And so Spring has sprung and the cloud/sun/rain app is all sold out in the app store. Speaking of which now we have the next few weeks of downloading “iPhone 7 compatible” upgrades for all apps on my iPhone 3 . Seasons change but some things remain the same. Trump is still a chance to be Top Dog while Broncos are no chance

It is amusing to see the negative backlash for Matt Lauers probing interrogation of Trump. What were they expecting — he makes Karl Stefanovic look like David Frost. I even got an email this morning from Eric Trump looking for donations for their campaign all because one day many years ago I briefly subscribed to Washington Times! The calamity still has not happened – or at least what your average yank considers a calamity. You could see this go down to the wire in a contest most called 6 weeks ago. It would be like Clive Palmer and Jacqui Lambie on a joint ticket here in Wonderland and still a chance going into polling day. At least they are only asking for nickel donations not dollars. (Warning – may be too clever for some readers). I do return to USA next March and there will be a new President either way. Could be interesting bordering on scary

Broncos sadly thought the Grand Final was 2 weeks ago. They played well then but now have gone back to usual crap. Brisbane hotels have reported bookings for their Mad Monday next week already! Smartest planning they have done all year. I cant recall a team getting such a poor “rub of the green” as Titans did last night. Yes you can say by letter of law it was a penalty try etc but really every call went Broncos way. The square up will probably come now with Jet and The Grey cited and sidelined for next week. Wont the Sydney media love showing the kick and headbutt on loop for next few days. To be fair I think the Cowboys players egged them on. One thing apparent in first half last night was Broncs should have held onto Taylor and let Hunt go. Really sick and tired of Hayne doing his Christ the Redeemer pose after any good thing he does. Luckily it only annoys me about 3 times a game these days

In other sporting news Jordan Day (known as Jason to his mates) suddenly cant find the middle of the fairway with a compass and flashlight. It is encouraging to all hackers when the world number one just loses his game like that – just wish it wasnt an Aussie. I have been on this earth for many years but cant recall a previous period when I didnt even know on a given day when Aussies were playing Test cricket or ODI in another country. Talk a bout a Who Cares fixture – second now only to a Bledisloe Cup match. Its Ashes and World Cup now and thats it.

In TV land Narcos Season 2 is very good once again as is Ray Donovan even if latter tends towards pulp fiction most of the time . Jon Voight is having a ball. It can be embarrasing at times to note some shows one still watches in a Melbourne Cup field of quality available really. Mostly due to having started the show back many years ago and hard to walk away from. However now I clearly have my running shoes on for Suits and Offspring. They jumped the shark, went back and back flipped with triple pike and then did a forward somersault and landed flat on their ass. Aussie TV has been bad for a long time now but it still surprises that in 2016 they can make a “new show” like Doctor Doctor and it will rate of course. Then again the forum post for Zumbas Desserts on Whirlpool runs to five pages!

The week started with a big wedding and even bigger night. Yes nothing like an old fool eh. So, waking up on Fathers day was not a pleasant experience having only got home on Fathers Day a few hours before hand! High Caloric intake helps to a degree in the recovery process but one still feels flat. And then one gets a present from da boys and all is good again

Better get out and do my chores for the day because as you know the weather forecast is – “chance of possible shower” and they are never wrong. How could they be really ? Its like saying Trump is a chance of winning, Broncos are a chance of beating Cowboys/Storm, buy a ticket for a chance at $10 million. Chances are one day they could be right!

So, back in Maryhole for almost a week and not a lot has changed. Which is FAD

One aspect of spending most of the previous two weeks on a barstool – apart for a couple of extra kgs – is you miss your usual TV programmes , especially sport. It was therefore interesting to fire up the recorded Back Page episode just prior to start of Olympics. You remember, this was when there were bold predictions of 20 gold medals and a top 3-5 position finish. How do we fall for this everytime ? Now, winning isnt everything but there comes a time when you have to face facts and seriously how can anyone believe a world champion saying she couldnt handle the pressure? True champions like Phelps and Bolt thrive on that stuff . Of more concern though then the belly flop in the pool is the poor form of usual reliable teams like our hockey players. Of course what does our media do – lets all jump on board the Boomers as likely gold medalists! Unbelievable. If the Boomers win a Silver it will be a stunning achievement. Of course the one certainty with any Aussie sporting group on tour is that not only will they likely under perform on the field but someone will act the goose off it too . Channel 7s coverage is woeful, especially their app. Best way for Olympics is give it to Fox Sports and make those interested pay for special channels. To try and watch a news programme on any other channel and only be able to see “stills” rather than actual video is pathetic. Of course the one glaring thing it once again shows – like the Census debacle – is we dont have the infrastructure to suddenly become an “online” “streaming” society. Had a clown from Telstra on phone yesterday with their 3 monthly checkup on “what we can do for you”. Starts off friendly but always gets a bit stroppy when you wont change to their internet plan even though you are already paying over $100 a month. “But we will give you a 1000 gig a month download” What for ?Cant use the 400 gig already get when you struggle at times to stream an SD version of original Jazz Singer without sound! Or colour! With Torrent sites about as reliable as Aussie Olympians I am all for streaming and paying for it but lets be real here – not paying premium for a service that spits and stutters like a 90 yr old with prostate cancer.

Of course the one advantage of Olympics is the return of Roy and HG to the airwaves. After a great first week though have to say second week has been a bit like the Aussie tilt at gold – fading fast. Of course the boys are not immune to commercial reality so have released a best of This Sporting Life album which once again happy to pay for

https://royandhg.lnk.to/ThisSportingLifeFB

In other sporting news the best 5 mins of NRL for Broncos was those after Parker was kicked in head last night. Great to see the boys line up for some whack. Could just be what is needed entering the finals. They wont win the big one of course. Think Canberra will stumble at end as well. My tip would be the Storm at this stage but part of me would like to see Cronulla do it – as long as Gallen doesnt play of course 🙂

In TV land caught a few of the Aussie series of late. Barracuda was scarily similar to what actually happened in Rio! Kettering is a bit sci fi for my liking while Cleverman is fresh and new. The best show currently returning though may well be Gruen. Like MAD AS HELL previously it is very clever and topical. The US ad for organ donors was brilliant

As a break from all the drama though have finally discovered Gilmore Girls on Netflix and it is an easy and enjoyable watch. Probably limit myself to 3 episodes max per day to avoid late onset Diabetes

Of course US politics has not changed in two weeks. Trump is still an asshat and Fox News and others still support him. I love travelling to USA as you know but really it is becoming a bit scary how thick a lot of them are. Just hope it is not contagious. Same for that hair

Great to see still have a few more cool nights to live with before the heat descends. And when it does the morons will rejoice as they always do