flashman181

The last 48 hrs have been long and it usually takes another 48 hrs before back on level ground after a long flight. But I feel ok if just a little ticked off about one thing:) Lets retrace

So the last day in San Fran was going to drag with an 8pm flight to LA and then the 14 hr jaunt to Brisvegas leaving at midnight. Anyway you look at it was ugly. Netflix was actually working well in the unit so while gray and gloomy stayed indoors and watched the first season of Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia but not usually in San Fran. I had been lucky. Funny show – add to list after I catch up with 3 weeks of my other other shows. Then the 4 pm taxi to airport and a smooth check in at American – despite general concern about no online check in. A nice meal , a glass of wine and before you knew it was almost 6pm! So went and sat at gate area for todays installment of “Yes I am a Moron but look I bought mt friends”. Plane was supposed to board at about 7:40 pm. Sitting in gate lounge blind Freddy knew that was not going to happen when there wasnt even a plane at our gate at 7:40 pm. Still the morons lined up ready to board despite no announcements. You will note with morons that they wear velcro – as soon as one lines up , another 6 are suddenly stuck right behind them. The ever courteous service lady informed then there was a delay. Then we had our first Seinfeld moment. “We expect to make up the time in the air” Seinfeld fans would know that his view is if you can go faster why not always go at that speed – hard to argue. Yes there circumstances and they give themselves some padding but where is the humour in that? So morons go away but 5 minutes later a plane arrives at gate so they line up again. “Ahh moron number 1 you may have noticed the passengers have not got off this plane yet!”. Finally around the actual planned leaving time we get our first announcement about starting to board. I dont understand the American way. I understand you board first, business etc at start but then you should start filling from back – like Qantas does – not from the front of economy?? When you do get on you cant move because your seat access is blocked by the front rows who arent settled yet! Anyway long story short we didnt make up any time and arrived late but no hassle. Now time for some Qantas efficiency. They started boarding at 23:00 for a 23:50 flight – this looked good. Of course you get the ignorant people mixing with the morons on these big flights. “We are starting to board rows 65-75 first, check your boarding pass” Little old lady with 21c clearly on her pass almost runs up. Of course they let her board because after all she is a little old lady. Then other people join in and it becomes a shambles. So we were boarded eventually and sitting in my Galley exit row seat this time with no one next to me – knobber knobber – by 23:30. Woohoo. We left the ground at 12:!5 am. No sweat we will make it up in the air and still land at 06:30 in Brisvegas

We didnt. We landed at about 07:15. I dont buy this international date line shit. We left at midnight on Sunday and arrived at 07:15 on Tuesday and I firmly believe we were in the air for the full 31 hrs! Certainly felt like it:( Now for my second Seinfeld line – like Elaine I actually find airplane food fine, especially Qantas long haul flights. You still feel like crap at end of flight but the food is very palatable and varied. So the bags came off ok and really the electronic passbook lane in Immigration and general Customs process works very smoothly at Brisbane and before you knew it was out at the front ready to catch the airtrain and then another train to Caboolture for CLP to pick me up. Of course being the sweet lady she is – there she was at the arrival gate to drive me home. Or maybe she just wanted to show off her hot new Bridge Street acquisition in a large crowd 🙂 Either way what was looking grim around 0700 was looking FAD at 0800. A couple of 40 wink naps during the rest of the day followed by a good 8 hrs sleep and it was time for the drive home to Maryhole. Being Australia this meant could leave at 0430 when the sun came up!

I dont ask for much in life. Happy and healthy family, the love of a good woman (although bad is perfectly acceptable at times), a single figure handicap and an Ashes series win. Now a couple of them may not happen as I dont have control over everything – just the important stuff. Like stopping at Maccas at Gympie when traversing between respective HQs of Flashman Inc at Maplehead and Maryhole. I leave early in the morning and I get a Sausage Egg McMuffin and Capucinno through Drive Through and on my way. Apart from fat and grease there is an ingredient in the McMuffin – hashish, double-filtered chocolate? – that makes them rather irresistable to moi. Now I have had issues before with the Gympie Maccas and unreliable coffee delivery in Drive Through. Why? – I have no clue, it is hot water and a filter machine basically but it breaks down a lot. And of course it had again – at least they had a piece of paper at entry to drive through so did not get stuck half way through has has happened before. Now the dilemma. While HJ piss all over Maccas for burgers in my view they lose out in the breakfast stakes but what was a man to do – it was only 05:20 in the morning and I needed caffeine. I know it sounds ridiculous to compare the relative merits of Maccas and HJ coffees – but less so after drinking USA swill for 2 weeks let me tell ya! So I drove into HJ drive through and wondered why no one took my order. Then I saw the sign – spookily the same size as the Maccas one and same penmanship only different message. “We open at 05:30 am” Fark. I was not going to be beaten, I sat in car for the 10 minutes and then saw some lights come on in hut. There were 3 cars behind me by now but still no magic voice out of the box at my window. Then off in the distance, but actually the drive through delivery window, I saw an arm stick out of the window and wave a hankie at me like the start of an F1 race. The speaker wasnt working it seems!! I burnt rubber of the grid let me tell you. Placed my order and waited while the harried lone worker couldnt get the change drawer opened. I said I will throw in 6 US dollars if you just give me some bloody coffee anytime soon!! Anyway finally served and quality was about as expected.

So it had been a wasted 15 minute period and still the longest part of the trip ahead. And then the Seinfled trifecta concluded. Even Steven!. There was no road work between Gimpland and Maryhole. They had actually done it all! So still arrived home in good time . Do a shop and fill the larder and then download a shitload of shows and relax for rest of the day.

I had shaved 24 hrs of the recovery time folks. And better still in another 24 hrs my dreams would come true

I can go back to my usual barista coffee and toast for breakfast. Forget your Golden Gate Bridge and Willis Tower – this was going to be huge. I may not be able to sleep

Especially if the meteorologists are right and it storms tonight. Wait a minute, did I really say that???

Life is good.