Day 29.1 – The Bitch from Berlin

Posted: October 18, 2014 in Travel

If you are adverse to fruity language leave now. Time to vent then I will be ok

Now it was a foggy morning which held hope for a sunny day later (Update 1100 hrs still thick fog!) so little Anal Flashy was checking our train trip tomorrow to Copenhagen on DB BAHN site. There has been a local S Bahn strike this weekend but U trains still running fine and after all our train is an ICE. Of minor concern was fact that when checking our station it said ” stop cancelled” . As were the first 8 stops of the 12 stop trip. No other info available . We were heading off to the Castle this morning so thought we should go via the HbF station to check as a phone call largely useless. We should be able to find a DB SERVICE or HELP station surely . Remember those terms viewers

So about 40 minutes in total to walk and train there because there is only 1 U train that serves that station and can only be caught from Brandenburg Gate. We found the DB SERVICE station and lined up for our HELP only to be confronted by a slightly less attractive version of Rosa Klebb if she had been German and hit with the ugly stick. I am still a little stunned so my recollection of conversation is also a bit foggy .

Our trip to Copenhagen tomorrow has been cancelled ?


Here are our tickets . These are cancelled ?

She takes tickets ,turns them over and stamps cancelled on them . Hands them back! Yes

How can we get to Copenhagen tomorrow?

You can’t , the train is cancelled

Can we go somewhere else?

You can use this ticket to get to Hamburg ( Editor :- note DB site says this stop is cancelled also)

Can we then get train from Hamburg to Copenhagen.


So how would we get from Hamburg to Copenhagen?

Maybe a bus .

Can you tell us anything about the buses in service


You useless fucking bitch. If you don’t understand the word SERVICE then fuck off and get another job. Like in the zoo

So it is now a couple of hours wasted and we have no idea what to do or where we stand. Let’s go to Berlin Tourist Info. Helpful enough and suggested a bus may work but has to be direct from Berlin ( No fucking bus runs from Hamburg – thanks bitch ) . Ok sounds good. Sorry, all buses full next 3 days

Ok back to SERVICE DB point while holding phone to ear because if get the Bitch again waving the next customer through and pretending to be busy. Ok this time we got Frau Blucher who was mildly more helpful as in

Yes that train is cancelled

Can we get on Mondays train leaving at same time?

I can transfer ticket to then but you have to go to ticket office upstairs to arrange seats.


Up to ticket office, not a long wait and at this stage we have seats on Mondays train which at this stage is running. A helpful lady this time, almost apologetic.

We then have to contact our landlord to see if can stay another night ( yes! ) or have to find a hotel. Then contact Copenhagen to inform them of our fate

Update Midday : Still thick fog

So at end of day we lose 24 hrs in Copenhagen which probably means no Hamlet castle sadly. Realistically, and in this weather,I have seen all of Berlin I need to so tomorrow looms as a wasted day. Maybe finally get that beer. We will be out of pocket maybe 120 Euro all up for extra stay – may recoup on insurance. Least of my concerns

All in all not much to moan about – you travel across the world , shit happens. Mind you out of 3 long distance train trips 2 have now been screwed up – no more for this little black duck in Europe

In general Berlin people have been great and friendly. But this turd behind a help desk needs a one way ticket to Topographie des Terrors. If I could speak German you dumb cow I would not be lining up at a help desk. It is mid morning – you must be a real ( insert naughty c word )by 4 pm!

I have not finished with these DB folk. Strikes happen ( although probably not in Adolf’s day to be fair ). It is your job though to at least help stranded people in your country who don’t understand the system or the language. I had always heard good things about DB. Methinks someone was telling porkies.

The owner of the apartment has been very helpful and will be saying so in my review on VRBO trust me.

Breathe. Breathe.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s