Baristaman – A New Superhero

Posted: May 9, 2012 in Midlife Crisis in Maryhole

In days of yore ( ie before Facebook) the preferred confidante of the male populace was the local neighbourhood barman in your local Pub. Many sorrows drowned under the watchful eye of your most trusted friend. Of course in those days there was only one type of beer and the only choice you had was Pot or Schooner – if you ordered a 7 oz shandy then the barman politely moved away to a more testosterone infested area – like the ladies toilets. Thus he was not very stressed with choice and had plenty of time to listen to your woes.

Drink Driving. This is a bad thing – always was, always will be. With the increased recognition of this (ok heavy fines associated with) less time is spent holding up the bar and lets face it the barman is usually some pimply youth with less life experience than you that would prefer that you sent your order in as a text message so as to avoid all possible human contact. Where to then?

Step up to the plate Mr Barista. I have altered my starting time at work to reflect when it most suits to grab my early morning caffeine fix. Nothing else matters – sick people will eventually get better or die – it’s a known medical fact. Sadly this is 0630 which starts to pinch as winter approaches. It is dark when I get up. It is cold even in Queensland. Is it all worth it? Of course. Much like when you walk into the clubhouse after a game of golf for your one beer you are allowed to have it is nice to have the barperson acknowledge your presence with a slight imperceptible nod followed by the swift delivery of your preferred poison in front of your favourite seat. We have got to the stage of no chat at all and it works fine for me but there is still that void of the confidential relationship.

So the car rumbles to life at 0625 for the short trip to Coffeeland – a quick phone call and with any luck Mr B even tips my name before I speak and states my order. Sadly this morning I get one of the lassies and have to give my order along with a name! This is worrying. Can I just state here that when you request Equal it is Equal you want – not bloody sugarine or anything else. Mr B knows this – does Lassie 1? I pull up apprehensively outside Coffeeland and lo and behold there is Mr B having a gasper around the side of the building. He smiles and waves – “its ok Dave I made your coffee before I came out here” All is right with the world

  1. Awwww… Young love, how cute.

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